Waving Through a Window

One of the hardest things I’ve had to come to terms with this year is the feeling of nostalgia. Moving to New York has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life and has come with many amazing opportunities. I am aware it’s a privilege to even be here, and am very grateful and humbled to even have the opportunity.

However, it still is extremely hard for me to think about the past. Feeling guilty about being away from my family, seeing some of my friends still at school together, or missing life in college has been a struggle of mine recently. Sometimes I long for the simple things - like being in sweatpants laughing with my friends about nothing.

I think it’s hard to sugar coat that outside the comfort you know, there are some challenging aspects. Your first year starting any new chapter in life will inevitably feel very lonely at times. Yes, there are so many freeing, incredible things that come with adulthood that shouldn’t be discounted. But sometimes it feels like you’re “waving through a window,” at comfort and not feeling it. It’s difficult to feel separated from a community you’ve made for yourself somewhere else. While change is necessary for growth, it still can sting.

I wish I had an answer on how to fix this isolated feeling, but all I can say is that if you are feeling this now, or maybe it’s your next step, remember you are not and will not be alone in this kind of feeling. I’m feeling it, people before you have felt it, and people after you may even feel it too.

I take comfort in the fact that these feelings won’t be forever. If you once made a community somewhere, you can do it again - no matter how long that takes! Focusing on the good aspects of following your dreams and making them reality will definitely help as well! Until then, just know I’m someone you can lean on if you’re struggling with life changes 💘!!